CONTAINS SPOILERS
After 8 years of our time, 13 years of their time, 180 episodes, 50 or so deaths, countless affairs, the backstabbing, the bitchiness, the rivalries, the break-ups and reconciliations… it all ends here.
May 13th 2012 marks the end of an era in guilty pleasure television: the finale of the very last season of Desperate Housewives. Allegedly based around the same idea that Marc Cherry originally had when he wrote the pilot, there’s no denying how much of a crowd pleaser this final feature-length send-off is.
With so many loose ends to tie up – namely Bree’s trial, Mrs McClusky’s cancer, Lynette and Tom’s impending divorce, Julie’s pregnancy AND Renee’s wedding – two hours barely seems long enough.
So it’s no surprise that some of these storylines end up intertwining. Luckily for the fans, this is done very cleverly. With Bree’s trial seeming increasingly hopeless, Mrs McClusky’s almost-death-bed faux-confession is an unexpected twist (although undoubtedly a very handy way of concluding the plotline). It’s a slight shame to see Carlos not given the chance to confess, though. Knowing how heavy it has weighed on his conscience, it seems slightly odd that he would be able to let a dying woman take the fall for him and for his guilt to seemingly just slide, even if she is pardoned. But for the sake of happy-ever-after, this can be overlooked.
With the trial out of the way, the second half suitably concentrates on what the show is best at: juggling hilarity and poignancy. Vanessa Williams’ turn as Renee Perry was given a mixed reception in her debut season, many considering her a sub-par Edie substitute and a watered down version of Ugly Betty’s Wilhelmina, but this year her character has stepped up and been a near essential addition to the cast, sometimes being the only level headed strong woman left as all the others fell apart emotionally and morally. It’s fitting, then, that her wedding be the centric plotline to the finale. Williams’ hysterical performance is very funny, and the scene in which Julie’s waters break on Renee’s wedding dress in a cramped limo had us in stitches.
But what is undoubtedly one of the most heart-warming and overdue moments of the entire season – and one that TRULY deserves its happy-ever-after conclusion – is Tom and Lynette’s inevitable reconciliation.
The scene itself is simple, sentimental and honest, and gets away with every romantic cliché in the book simply because these two characters just work together and have done for nearly a decade. When Tom says he loves her “this much” with a goofy wide arm gesture and Lynette looks at him, holding a bag of ice, and says “my ice is melting and I’m not sure what you’re saying”, it’s a perfect understated moment that sums up their awkward, conflicted yet wonderful relationship. Later on, Lynette’s toast to “remembering” at Renee’s wedding reception is the perfect final speech from this smart, witty and believably flawed character.
To finish it all off, it’s hard not to feel warmed when the girls meet one last time for a traditional game of poker, followed a fan-pleasing “what-they-did-next” montage. Lynette and Bree’s are fairly standard and show their success and future happiness, but seeing Gaby and Carlos arguing into old age is a perfect homage to their firey relationship, as is the brilliantly witty yet touching line from Carlos: “other couples may waltz through life, but we do the tango!”.
It’s a shame we did not get to see Susan’s future, but her final scene, driving through Wisteria Lane being watched by the ghosts of all those who died during the show’s eight seasons (reminding you just how much fatality this street has been witness to, the four women are lucky to get out alive!), is perfectly pitched, although the absence of Edie Britt is very much noticed and somewhat breaks the spell that the episode has had the viewer under for 90-odd minutes. The very last scene of a new housewife hiding a new secret in Susan’s house is a brilliant final wink at the fans, just to give them one final secret, this time, one to never be solved.
Looking back over the final season, there are a few little continuity niggles that are now never to be wrapped up, such as Andrew and Danielle’s mysterious absence from Bree’s trial, and her romance with Trip seems a little rushed, given how little the character has developed. But these are simply niggles.
A scene which montages Renee’s first dance with Ben, Julie giving birth and Mrs McClusky passing away is enough alone to allow forgiveness for all kinds of flaws the show has, because it sums up neatly the power the show has had over its fans. It has made them laugh, made them howl, made them gasp, made them scream, made them cry and made them bawl.
As Mary Alice says, these women’s lives have been “desperate, but worth living” and seeing behind each closed door, hearing each hushed voice and muttered secret has undoubtedly been worth it.
The question is, where are fans going to get their gossip from now? Bring on DH creator Marc Cherry’s Devious Maids, we say!
What did you think of the finale? Are you going to miss Desperate Housewives? Let us know below…
> Buy the Seasons 1-7 boxset on Amazon.
Watch the Season 7 trailer…