The Doctor Who Fan Service Hot Line Week 7: Kerblam!

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A timely episode to remind us that, just before Christmas, warehouse staff aren’t getting blown up and therefore have absolutely nothing to complain about.

Press 1 if you watched an episode of Doctor Who where the thinly-veiled Amazon allegory turned out to be good, presumably part of a bloody politically correct social justice warrior campaign by the left-wing BBC.

Press 2 if you lost any sense of tension around about the third time Yaz said ‘Dan’ because it just took you right back to Alan Partridge.

Press 3 if you found yourself considering the deployment of teeth in creepy robots for the first time.

Press 4 if you were impressed with the villain’s cover scheme extending to only blowing up Lee Mack above a sluice gate so he had less guts to mop up.

Press 5 if you only just remembered that Yaz is a police officer.

Press 6 if you found that episode really stressful but that you normally release tension by popping bubble wrap.

Press 7 if you think the Doctor counts different versions of K9 as different dogs, because when she says ‘Some of my best friends are robots’ she can’t mean Kamelion.

Press 8 if you will be incredibly disappointed if Alan Cumming gives a restrained performance next week.

Press 9 if you were glad to see that you can actually give three companions something to do for an episode.

Press # if you heard the Doctor say that there are no bad systems but can suggest Windows 7 for starters.

Press * if you would suggest that a system that actively blows up its own employees can be argued to be actually bad.