This article contains spoilers for The Eaters of Light, and indeed contains much knowledge regarded as forbidden.

Press 1 if you think Chibnall should see what Barbara Clegg is up to.

Press 2 if you can’t even look at a raven anymore without getting all the feels.

Press 3 if you thought tonight’s episode was what happens when Forest of the Night decides it’s time to grow the hell up.

Press 4 if you think that, if the away end at Falkirk is anything to go by, Scotland fiercely resisted the whole indoor toilet thing until about 2004.

Press 5 if you have used this episode as an excuse just to watch the whole of Season 26 again.

Press 6 if you’re delighted that Survival’s lesbian subtext is now a surtext.

Press 7 if, just while we’re talking about the McCoy era, you think someone should really adapt it as a series of comic books.

Press 8 if you think there should be a multi-Doctor story where all the Scottish Doctors team up. Something about Brigadoon perhaps. Tennant has to use his normal voice.

Press 9 if you won’t be happy until Big Finish bring back Gordon Tipple.

Gleefully mash the * button if next week can’t come fast enough.

Furiously mash the # button if you fear the march of time, for it bringeth the end of Capaldi and yea, there shall be much weeping and gnashing of teeth and arguing on Gallifrey Base in threads called ‘Doc12 is just PG-rated Rick Sanchez -discuss’.

Mash the keypad with your fist if you just read The Eight Doctors for the first time in decades and it read like Alan Partridge writing Doctor Who fan fiction.